Uniquely me.

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This blog is so not responsible for any thing that happens here.
Well, nothing is going to hurt you unless you want to quarrel.
Beware of my machine guns!

freaky stuffs do happen

this week has been quite uh,hectic?loads of cramming,mugging,stressing out :P its like the replay of pre-O's ): not very nice at all..

i miss the old times.i dont care how we are now.i miss how we were..a lot!i remember how you used to tease joel and i and stuff..and then,in the end the sweetest things happened(: how you used to write those nice things,say nice stuff to me and give me things.we were so innocent back then.like liking someone because of who they were,and not because of who they hang-out with or how smart they are.those days were the days that i was truely happy.but now,ohwell..different story.hmm,imy a lot!

and i swear i have the coolest uncle in the whole entire world!i think he was random,bored and had nothing better to do.BUT,i still think he's awesome :D love you much,uncleeee <3

now im confused.like a gazillion times more confused than i was before.
hmm,how now blue cowwwww ):
you dont irritate me,but you always make me unsure and you're far away..
you irritate me at times,always make me unsure,but you're near...
sigh.
the feelings are starting to go away..well,maybe its because i want them too.but they come back at times too.ohwell..just let nature do its stuff..

Friday, March 26, 2010 - 11:01 PM

imy.

im supposed to study for my 3CD MAT test..but,i cant.
concentration span too short...my mugging mode needs to be turned on.like NOW.ohwell..this weekend is going to be crazy ):
i.am.drowning.in.biology.i.cant.breathe.properly.
massive sad face!
i miss you a lot a lot a lot! its like i know something is wrong..but i cant ask,i cant know what you're upset over.i feel bad.like we've become total strangers.and i bet its because of me.i can never ever handle relationships properly.SUCKS.i hate being me.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010 - 10:16 PM

ROFL.

this is why i love my uncle very much:

"why not tell him how you feel..."

"but find a good place to hide first."

LOL.ohgosh,just imagine the scene.my uncle is officially the funniest guy in the world.hmm,make that the universe!my uncle is awesomeeeeee XD

my uncle just made my day by chatting with me for a while.but then,someone spoiled it like *poof*.ohwell.time to let my sarcasm take over...i miss you uncle.i miss everyone back in singapore.i dont want to stay here and suffer from bad relations.my uncle just became like one of my best friends.how cool is that ey! (:omg,i dont wanna go to school tmr.i dont wanna see you ever again.i.hate.you.yes,i do...really!
okay,im going to cry myself to sleep again.like how normal is that?!

Tuesday, March 23, 2010 - 10:27 PM

hail the hailstorm

for the benefit of people who did not bother to check their facebook or to google it up,
"LARGE PARTS OF WESTERN AUSSIELAND (or at least where im staying) EXPERIENCED THE WORST STORM IN A DECADE."
how cool is that ey?and it hailed :D which means that it was raining ice.like seriously rock solid ice.nope,there isnt anything wrong with your screen..IT RAINED ICE.cool ey!dark clouds (which mr soon would have called ' extremely threatening skies'..not good for flag raising),gusty winds,heavy rain,hail,branches falling off trees,and flash floods made up this bad storm.and apparently my house is kinda like a little island now..beyond the main gate,it is flooded.like seriously.and i dont know how im going to get to school tmr.anyone going to answer me?wellwell,but life still goes on.its just a storm right?normal! (:

because you exist,my life is in misery.because you exist,my life is screwed.because you exist,i havent smiled for three days.because of you,my life is topsyturvey and filled with moodswings.but then again,because of you,my life is complete ♥

Monday, March 22, 2010 - 10:07 PM

over the rainbow

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

this song is so awesome!its so peaceful,so dreamy,its just mindblowing.

fml,i dont know what to do.i wish you never existed.my life would be so much better without you.just disappear,really..just get out of my freaking screwed life.i hate you very very much.

IMYC!

Saturday, March 20, 2010 - 9:28 PM

♥

i'd rather you not like me and we remain as good friends,then us not being friends at all.well,im contented with the way we are now..good friends,math buddy,facebook buddy,suanning each other like crazy,reminiscising about singapore days,talking about food..at least we're talking.the first few weeks of school,we werent even talking..thats a massive improvement.♥

Friday, March 19, 2010 - 11:08 PM

fun aquatics'10

[jamie.atiqah / priya.jamie]

[priya.jamie / joel.jamie / ernest.jamie]

[pearl.victoria.jamie / brittany.jamie / seetha.jamie]

[isabelle.jamie / ashley.jamie / tezella.jamie]

[during volleyball / before sync. swim]

[U.S - F / tezella.seetha.isabelle.priya.jamie]

[priya!bear dance partner (:]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

as you can probably tell,we had an awesome day at fun aquatics :DD
fun time taking photos,fun time getting wet,PURE FUN (:
people in singapore,you guys are missing out on so much!but its okay,i still love you guys! =D

Thursday, March 18, 2010 - 7:43 PM

fml

FML.
im soooo dead.
the whole world doesnt need to know this.
and nooooo!
i dont want you to avoid me! D:

and see,rachel..im not doing the white on white thing anymore (:

Wednesday, March 17, 2010 - 4:14 PM

happiness.

today was an awesome day.probably the ONE day that i was looking forward to after so long (:
( and apparently,my moodswings are horribleeeee ): )
I HATE MOODSWINGS.shall declare war on moodswings soon!
and yeah,so today was awesome.chemistry test came back!math test wasnt too bad!math class was awesome and funny!joel thought he was going to die..cuz of the super strong wind XD i swear no other guy can make me laugh like that.LOL.okay,maybe besides rodan.hahahah!but thats besides the point.the point is,joel's really scared of little things..like freaky dolls and strong winds blowing the ceiling boards (: ohwell.6 classes today..3 of which was using internet (more like FB),and one was slacking/talking/asian food-ing with joel,stephs and kimby.how much more awesome can any day get?
tmr.private.study.joel.must.teach.me.that.stupid.math.question.that.i.dont.understand.if.
not.i.gg.die.alr ):
even if there wasnt any outcome,i'll probably be happy to settle for this.our eyes can finally meet,and stay there for a few seconds,without the awkward silence.♥

Tuesday, March 16, 2010 - 8:10 PM

i cant make myself smile.

i feel like i need to be alone.i feel like i need to cry.i feel like i need a hug.i feel like i need some company.i feel like im going to implode.i just need someone to be there,not to question me,not to ask me stuffs.i need someone to be beside me,to give me the moral strength.i dont want this moodswing to go on forever.

i feel bad ignoring you.its subconscious.but whats the point of making myself fall so hard?i know that you'll be happier this way.to love someone,is to let that person be happy.if i can never have you,then i'd rather you be happy with whatever you're going to do with your life.

Monday, March 15, 2010 - 4:58 PM

simple.

all i want now,
is to be happy.

Sunday, March 14, 2010 - 10:17 PM

i miss you extremely much

no chatting with rachel this week.SAD FACE.my life is saded.it really is..i just had the worst day in australia.imagine how freaking pissed i was.but luckily,i got my smartrider out of the washer before it was turned on.if not,gg-fied ):

FML man.i totally agree with my awesome uncle now.LOVE SUCKS.it just makes you get hurt over and over again until either you swear never to love someone again,or you're immune to it.if you knew that things arent going to go your way,would you still do the same and let yourself get hurt?sigh X a million.how i wish life was like a fairytale:
guy meets girl,girl meets guy,happily ever after.
but NO,
it doesnt work this way.its goes :
guy meets girl,girl meets guy,guy meets another girl,girl still looks at guy,guy continues talking to another girl,girl is heartbroken,guy has happy face,girl has sad face.
wtf?
you were the one that asked me if that was what the teacher was teaching.then when i asked you what she was teaching,you said it was my fault that i disturbed you and you couldnt pay attention..wtfff?!
even though it may seem like you've annoyed the hell out of me,i dont know why i still dont hate you.
must be the chemistry.

Saturday, March 13, 2010 - 9:22 PM

failed

!@#$%^&*#(!*&^%
this is damn fail luh.OMG.in the first place,the more people we invite,the more complicated it will become.apparently it is obvious now.wtfwtfwtf.this is one of those times that i go 'hmm,this will never happen with rachel,shuhadah,lynette and roi'.no,seriously..this is damn crappy.not like i was looking forward to go to joel's house or anything.im just disappointed.i mean like you plan the whole damn thing and then when things crop up,you say that you're not going and then ask me to ask another person.wtf?okay,i know im damn mean and stuff.but seriously,who wouldnt be pissed?!and so,i've decided not to go to joel's house alr.i mean like whats the point right?!so off to lunch with stephdummy(:

- 11:26 AM

i want lunch.

done with chemistry test (:
im happy now..
haha!
but i dont think im going to do well.
cuz its difficult to put what i wanna say into words.
so sentence structure = bleh!
i want singapore chemistry back! ):
ooh,
and i hope joel will get more than 40marks for his chemistry test.
cuz if he does,
he's going to treat me to lunch (rich person)..
and rodan gets a share too.
so why not? (:
but i think he's really brave to take the paper after only a few hours of chemistry in 4 months.
haha!
although he ended up in mr grant's class,
but still.. :D

today was slackkkkk :D
chemistry was free period.
one of the ELACS was free period too.
and the other was just the 8 sentence thing.
private study,lunch and first MILE was spent doing chemistry.
whoots!
had good company too :D
heh (:
now my circle of friends is really starting to expand.
but still miss my singapore friends T.T

Thursday, March 11, 2010 - 5:40 PM

7th march 2010 !

[leslie.hsinyang.sweetney.isabelle.victoria.wenling.pearl.stephanie charmaine.joel.jamie.stephanie lim.brittany!]

that sunday that i only chatted with rachel for 3hours.
the impromtu outing that i decided to go for.
the one i went and spent $0.
the day i reached home at 7pm and the sky was already dark!
the first time i spoke to him for more than a minute (:
proud of myself :D

Wednesday, March 10, 2010 - 6:43 PM

not obsessed.

omg,someone just told me the best piece of news ever!okay,its not really the BEST news,but still,its good :D i hope that my chemistry class has got lesser people then mr grant's chemistry class.*crosses fingers*and mrs h.,please allowwwww!*double crosses fingers* :D

Tuesday, March 9, 2010 - 9:03 PM

im smart.

somethings happen for a reason.and sometimes,you dont have to react to it.what will happen,will happen.but i dont know about this.i dont BADLY want things to go my way.i KNOW it wont.i mean,im not dumb in anyway..i can understand hints when their so freaking obvious.whats up with acting emo when everyone's having fun?whats up with staying all silent when lunch and recess is supposed to be the time that you start crapping?its obvious.hello?im not blind.its just a matter of time.and probably the earlier this gets over,the better.put an end to my suffering,will you?sometimes,the most imhumane thing to do,is the most humane way of doing stuffs.and its reality.and i'll happily face up to reality.i have people telling me that things will go my way.all i have to do is to wait.(how long am i going to wait?a month?a year?ten years?)but at the same time,i have people (many people,in fact) that totally dont think that things will work out.yes,it is evil.but how evil can it be if me myself dont think its ever going to happen.i'd be lying if i said that i didnt want things to go my way.it hurts whenever i say that you two will end up together.but whats the point of having high hopes when in the end,im going to be the injured one,and no one's going to give a damn about me?i really dont wanna get disappointed again.i really dont.i will wait.its just that i feel really guilty.i just started having conversations that last longer than 5 sentences,just starting staring into your eyes and not have the awkward silence.i dont want this to be over.not now.its just not the right time.i want to continue to talk to you.i dont want to ignore you,to avoid you.but whenever i talk to you,i feel like im a third party.and it sucks big time.i'll wait.but i dont want to be hurt,again.no one gets it.maybe im just too weak.i cant make myself strong again.i truely understand whats the meaning of 'once bitten,twice shy' now.i dont want a replay of that horrible day.it was bad,yes it was.but then,the after-effects are way worst.okay,i need to get over this and get on with my life.and you know what sucks more?people that arent even involved in this thing giving their useless comments.this isnt a game.at least it isnt if you arent involved.and before anyone makes any comments,we should really think..how would it feel like if you were in such a situation?okay,IT SUCKS.

Monday, March 8, 2010 - 6:38 PM

know your limits.

and yes,
im back to start rambling.
AGAIN.
so apparently chat session with rachel was cut short cuz she had to study for MSA and i decided to go to the city.
good choice?
hmm...maybe not.
okay firstly,
it was quite awesome cuz its the first time i've ever had a face to face conversation with him for longer than a minute.
and rachel,
nope..im not obsessed with him.
so it was quite cool luh.
but i cant deny that i was pissed off at some point(s) in time.
i've got to get this clear,say...by july?
but the earlier the better OMG.
or i'll just faint and die from all these complicated stuff T.T
shit sia.
anywayanywayanyway,
empathy people went for class gathering yesterday.
nice one peops.
if justice has a class outing and i cant go,
im going to be sooo angry ! ):

i hope this week is going to be good.
but with chemistry test on thursday,
i doubt it D:

Sunday, March 7, 2010 - 9:11 PM

pictureful post!

♥ you guys very much!

Saturday, March 6, 2010 - 8:05 PM

not ready.

im not ready to give you up.
i probably will never be.
i want you to stay with me forever and ever.
but i know its impossible.
i hope that day that we have to separate wont come so soon.
miss you tonnnnnnnnes ):

- 5:48 PM

lies and truths.

sometimes i wonder if what you tell me is the truth.or are they just a bunch of lies?a lie is a lie,no matter what.if you dont even have to courage to speak the truth,i dont know what else i can say.

- 12:39 AM

when i'm confuzzled

i have never met someone with moodswings like this.incredible.sheesh.

IM DAMN CONFUSED! ): my brain tells me to go left,my heart tells me to go right.so impossible.ROAR.but im over with the ignoring part.its so childish.haha.msn was good.it always IS good.but then when its comes to face to face,the awkwardness ):

math was funny.maybe its the turning point for this whole damn thing.
firstly,while we were doing QQs,rodan and joel randomly turned back and waved at me while i was thinking of how to do the question..wth,TWICE okay?randomness to the max sia.then joel passed me a piece of foolscap and asked me to write some chinese stuffs on it.i happily took it,flipped it,started reading,and then i couldnt stop laughing.these guys are seriously bored during math.and im going to join them and get random on monday.teehee.

but im still not sure.like 0% sure about this. T.T instincts and observations say forget.but heart clings on.wthhhhhhh D:crapshit.
monday period 4 .tuesday period 5 and 6.wednesday period 2 and 3.friday period 4 and 5.
this is soooo confusing.roar-ness.how i wish i could read people like books.anddd,i think i typed the wrong stuff in the conversation just now. T.T did i?i dont know.great.no one knows.and its over even if i did type the wrong stuff.

synchro swim on 17th :D looking forward,really.can do the bear dance with priya (: and thrash lincoln!

♥my day will be incomplete without you.

Friday, March 5, 2010 - 9:48 PM

immiscible liquids.

somehow,someway,sometime.

even though i might say that i enjoy the company i get here,
but the more i enjoy,
the more i miss all the people back there..
and then i start to self-isolate.
sometimes,
i feel awkward.
like this whole thing is so wrong.
im just hoping that at the end of the day,
i wake up and find that this is just a nightmare.
i wish.

this whole thing is a nightmare.

Thursday, March 4, 2010 - 5:04 PM

confused

msn is being an ass by not letting me call my mummy and talk to her.
evilness.

so what now.
im tired,depressed,demoralised and confusd.
not the best mood that i can be in.
stupid msn has to fail me now.
wth.
whats your problem?omg.seriously you got more moodswings than me.when you want to talk then keep talking.then i ask you questions you get irritated.whats your problem man?!but at least you give me some advice.so yeah,whatever.i have no idea what to do now.my mind's in a blank.
yesterday was quite awesome.
chat with mr lam!
omg,so fun (:
haha.
wait till i get back in july man..
i wont stop.
heee.
i miss those days.
andandand,
thing have really changed after we graduated..
so its really really really as if we're friends now.
awesomeness!
haha.
JULYYYY :D

IMY.IMY.IMY.IMY.IMY.IMY ):

Wednesday, March 3, 2010 - 9:38 PM

determined

if i can do it for one day,i can do it for the rest of my life.seriously,i can.whats the big deal?!you are like seriously pissing me off big time.my life would be better off without you okay.you are just a random invisible person now.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010 - 4:54 PM

being alone.

i know im quite lag.
but then today,
i really really felt that i was alone.
not physically,
(cuz i had tez to accompany me and vice versa)
but like emotionally.
i never felt this way before..
back then,
i always felt tha no matter what happens,
there's someone that could read my mind,
and guide me along.
there was always something for me to look forward to.
but now,
its different.
i think i've got bad moodswings.
sometimes,
i just feel like crying.
but then,
whats the point of crying when you dont feel better at the end?
it just makes your eyes smaller.

whenever i said that i enjoyed myself in singapore,
i really did.
i could just let my hair down and do crazy,whacky stuff.
but here,
its different.
so many things going through my mind at any one time.
about today,
yes,i enjoyed myself.
but no,i didnt enjoy it.
besides the fact that im burnt,
its just the wrong company.
not all though,
just some.
well,
my life would be better without some people,wouldnt it?
im confused.
i miss RSLR.
why cant things go back to then.
why didnt i treasure those times?
WHY?!
i feel so pissed at myself at times.
im angry,high and sad at the same time.
but i can never tell people here why i feel this way.
besides the fact that we arent that close..
i dont even know it myself.
hmm,
if only i could read my own mind.

once bitten,twice shy.seriously.thats why i dont want history to repeat itself again.once,is enough.more than enough.probably a good thing that i jumped out of it early.now is not the time to be get emotional and distracted.

Monday, March 1, 2010 - 9:44 PM